Wednesday, September 24, 2008


for the purpose of clarity, lets give the second Mikun-call him playa playa anoda name Kayode.

Mikun started to kiss her and then touch her and then caress....building up to...their usual form of lovemaking.....then suddenly, he lets her go and says I can't I'm sorry.....I will only be seeing u in my mind's eye as dirty....dirty!...for u to have done such a thin....I'm sorry....then again ....he grabs her and starts to kiss her roughly , very passionately....which was a bit unusual to Shalewa......after a while, Shalewa...says in a quiet voice......stop!....Stop!...this is not u...this is not my MIKUN, i RILY THINK WE SHOULD END THIS...IF THIS IS THE WAY U'RE GONA BE WITH ME...U'LL ALWAYS REMEmER THE TEXTS...ITS CONTENTS AND IT'LL HAUNT ME FOREVA.

sINCE IT WAS STILL LIKE 5AM, bOTH sHALEWA AND Mikun went to sleep again,Shalewa quicly sent a txt to Mikun telling him yawa don gas and Mikun had effontry to say maybe its even better it turned out like this blah blah.. she switched off.til she was about to forget about the whole episode and give her final apologies to Mikun....thou her heart was truely now with Mikun, and propos e to continue the relationship with a promise neva to see or speak to Kayode anymore.

She woke up finally to find Mikun on the phone..........I think we should meet to sort this out man to man....she's in a serious relationship and I love her very much.....I dont know why u want to destroy what we have.........Shalewa was like....shocked....damn......this is serious....he was calling Kayode up......he wasnt shouting....tht is not the kind of man he was but he was threatening......asking Kayode to leave his fiancee alone......Shalewa sef didnt know she had become fiancee....with no ring cut the long story short....thou Shalewa's heart laid with Kayode, she stayed away from Kaode for 1 month.even during the month so so check check of phone...tailing of car.....Mikun wan give himself hypertension...."where are u?.......shalewa"-" I'm just leaving my office"".....ok wait for me....i'M COMING.....ONLY TO APPEAR 2 MINS LATER ALL THE WAY FROM HIS OFFICE WHICH is like an hours drive.just to be sure I rily was in th e office.....sHALEWA SOON GOT TIRED OF THE LACK OF TRUST AND CLOSE MARKING SO SHE HAD TO BREAK UP WITH mIKUN(THTS ANODA LONG STORY)....she broke up with Mikun to go to Kayode....but alas!Kayode turned out to be the guy she blogged about....using her favorite songs.....dido,shade,emimem,asa......( u shd read that post)....

so we can all see tht karma is a bitch.....Shalewa fucked Mikun up and Kayode in turn fucked her up.....instant karma.what goes around comes around.....evn thou Kayode did not cheat...he broke her heart all ye biffers...u see i got wht was coming to me.....cos there was one very passionate commentator I had to delete....saying im a whore and what not and i tot ki la gbe, ki lo ju!..sori non yoruba speaking peeps...this one is not as hard to translate as it is to make meaningful so we'll leave it at tht.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008


pa pa pa pa pa.....(hard slaps)Shalewa woke up grudgingly and slept back again,she is a deep sleeper
pa pa pa pa pa pa...(harder slaps)Shalewa woke up with a start only to find a mobile phone which she could recognise as hers being thrust into her face.....

"Who is Mikun"......

fuck...fuck ....fuck! busted ...thot Shalewa...a mixture of emotion washed over Shalewa as she realised that all sleep had drained from her body and all she felt now were panic, disorganisation, empathy,pity,desperation..panic becos she felt....she was busted!disorganisation... cos of the suddenness of it all plus she was wondering how she was going to answer the barage of questions sure to follow.empathy....cos she realised how poor Mikun must be feeling right now....with that she looked at him properly....his eyes were red...apparently Mikun had not got any sleep at all that nite and he had been crying....rily!.pity....for herself cos she knew the relationship could neva be same as it was again......she realised sadly the rule had ben broken"don't be caught , they used to say to each she was caught, be caught and its over she used to it would be over!damn!.Desperation because she felt she had to deny it with all her being cos she could not stand/bear the hurt on his face.panic....because in the mobile phone she that was being thrusted at her lay all the evidences any juror needed to prosecuted and pronounce guilty as charged.she had forgotten to delete the messages.

The previous night, Mikun had come to pick Shalewa from work where she was facing end of year blues and had closed so late at about kidding....Shalewa did not have any idea that that she was going to end up in Mikun's room that weekend...or is it Friday.The only option was to go over to his place cos the drive to hers woulda been too dangerous for her.Shalewa was tired from the all work done that day so she jsut got in had a bath and Mikun cooked dinner for her,sahe fell asleep while eating.

Shalewa collected the phone being thrust at her and began to read...of course she knew the contents , hadnt she typed those same words herself."Sexy, can't wait to be with you, I remember the feel of your tongue on me,ur carresses.....I hope I'll come this so so horny"

"I said who is Mikun!".....
He's just a friend......
just a friend and u're sending him this kind of texts messsages.....I read his texts to u first and I thot mayb...I so wanted to believe its not true...i thought maybe...he was just being funny and the texts were unsolicited....
"Please , I just wana know how long u been seing this guy"Mikun said quietly.....

'Okay, Shalewa said finally....been seeing him for quite a while but i swear to u I didnt sleep with him and I'm not planning to"
"You expect me to believe that...with all this texts....blah blah.....u can imagine how the rest of that conversation went...

Shalewa in frustration said I'm rily sorry Mikun...I guess I've broken the rule....u are free to relieve yourself of this relationship.Whateva your decision....I'll take it.I'm sorry.

'This isnt't about breaking up, I love u , I still want u.....just promise it won't happen again. He was crying now just as she was.

I am Shalewa....Shalewa is me.and this story will not be continued

To be continued.........

Thursday, September 11, 2008

a lil bit of me

I recently came across an article about the zodiac signs and it was either that it was a lil different from the ones i had read previously or I'm older now and i can be more objective about how i view myself so i decided to do a lil bit of analysis on how right on spot the article was...


planet -mars
symbol-the ram
strengths:-dynamic, engaging and candid

let me start the analysis at this junction before i go on cos there's more and i dont wana loose track.

ok element-fire.....i choose to analyse this in a quirky way......i am not a soft person....and im quite a confident and courageous person and when im angry....i hardly AM...(INFACT A LOT OF TIMES I HAVE TO FORM ANGRY WHEN I WANT to chastise people).....but wen i do....i damn all consequences and my eyes brims wih fury and brimstones men!

planet- mars....another quirky analysis of this.....sometimes even i myself think im from planet thinking sometimes could be very different from the next person's...or in that men are from mars and women are from venus kinda way i would qualify for a man cos a lot of folks say i act and think like a man and im tough like a man so mayb i am from mars.....but all na demo o. my first or is it second post to undastand that one......i won't say more, u know how rams are stubborn....i could be very headstrong and set in my ways especially wen i've made my mind up about something.


yeah, if it were possible to have the ruby as an engagement ring...thats wht i would like...a ruby ring.

strengths-dynamic, engaging and candid

I am very dynamic so that makes me think that sometimes i actually dont know what i want....this minute im loving content....the next im not and .....very very unhappy until i find another challenge....which brings me to how much longer i'll find blogging interesting.....

engaging-i think im fasciinating....which is why i find a lot of people being easily attracted to me....dont get me wrong im not talking physical attributes but mayb its the way i talk, laugh,think, make jokes....etc...i dunno

candid-tht one is so so true.....i lack tact......infact im only recently beginning to learn it as it is very vital for the kind of job i do.....u see i'm in client services. i spit it as it is,like my life dpended on being that candid and honest about it like im trying to prove a point or im saying that is the way it is, i dare u to bite me.

back to the article
faults-headstrong,impulsive, erratic

my favorite phrase wen im about to get angry, "don't try me i can be very unreasonable wen i'm angry"....and im also very impulsive.....that can be very helpful at in i take on the spot decision and i take risks very easily....i'll tell u a my workplace , they placed some cars on bid list and people were given like a month to go see these cars before they placed their bids. what did ur dearest cynic do???i went ahead and bidded for a car for a riduculous amount i had fixed in my head and i didnt even go to see the car.....despite the fact that the cars were on the island and i live on the island and these days im relatively jobless on the end of the day.....i got an ok car even better than some pple tht went for inspection....i dont know how tht happened....dont ask me.

I can be very headstrong up to the point that i play the devil's advocate more often than not even wen i myself dont agree with the motion im arguing for ...i do it just for the kicks.
back to the article...
arians love freedom and will accept any challenge,they insist on going their own way and are not easily swayed by reason.their energy can make them seem aggressive, they make good leaders inspiring and caring for their followers but by the same token they do not make good herd members and can be uncooperative in groups.

again i pause here and analyse...

i love my freedom to the extent that i sometimes wonder how im gona cope in marriage...i still feel that idf i get a job in the bahamas today all i'll go whether i have a family or not i'll pack up my bags and leave....thts why my bro always says.. ..any guy tht eventually marries me he''ll say he has finally tamed the shrey....i call it the bohemian in me....i like to do what i want and im always ready for the consequences of my first trip to dubai.....i went alone and i was super-excited even though i didn't know anybody there and i was not going mainly for business but for pleasure, i also like the freedom to take my own decisons, right from when i hit 16,i knew what i wanted in life...i wasn't even an adult then.i have a lot of energy and sometimes wen i see someone act lack-lustre all the time i feel like... wtf.....u know this phrase was in one stupid yoruba movie i watched....there was this chic who had a very niceee..... hubby and a very bad friend wu was always giving her bad advice,....she advised her one day to disobey her hubby....since he was bobo nice and go for a nite party with her(she wasnt married o)...that particular time the rily mad and he slapped her ...the guy immediately started apologising..feeling sober ,so she called this her silly friend and told her the story...d friend was like ....o fo e leti ke(he slapped u!)...she now advised her thus.."o mo nkan to ma ba dele ni irole ko ti fi robb para , now comes the phrase i want to put the emphasis on" ko wa dera lebi apere tomati"(look inactive and dejected and very weak like a basket of rotting tomatoes...the kind they sell in mile 12) in i hate people who dera le like apere tomati when they are not sick.cos i'm usually smart walking and energetic and when im sick too....i actually dera le bii apere tomati...ask my sis.i also hate being bored and i get bored very easily.and when im making a point i strongly believe i could come off a lil aggressive as in my veins stand up.I like my surbodinates(very few that i have) to be very happy and free with me but that does not mean i condone laziness, when im asked to lead i give it my all but i dont volunter for leadership positions and i'm actually very responsible when in a leadership role, but if i'm to follow .....its not like i dont like to follow but im a rebel by nature so i'll almost always ask why? before i do something d leader asks me to do...and can be uncooperative if i feel a leader is taking advantage of me or the group.

back to the article.....

they are open and honest,sometimes to the point of a partner, an arian is a captivating creature,they tend to get bored easily and will run at the first sign of trouble,often purely to cause drama.they are ruled by their hearts and will follow its mood without much reflection....

i am open and honest so as such i believe i don't have any secrets sef...i tell it as it is so free especially when i know u ...i tell u whats going on in my mind verbatim....thts why its frustrating for me when i feel i can't read someone cos with me u dont need to wish for a magic mirror into my heart and soul cos my words and everythn im feeling is always plain to see...what u see is what u get....i wear my heart on my sleeve so to speak(not in a stupid way o),,,,if i'm happy, its on my face....if i'm sad....its there toooo. if im lost.....i look rily lost,im open and u can almost read me i mean literally like a book,i can't hide my feelings.i think i have a captivating nature as the article implies cos not blowing my trumpets...i have actually broken a lot of hearts in my time.......cos i get tired of relationships very easily......until recently iv dated people for as short as 5 weeks..

when i fight with my bobos then,....i'll be so angry i'll say oya i want to break up with u....cos most of the time i know they'll beg ....u knw a lil drama....i actually even admitted to my last boyfriend when he said "cynic ma pa fun mi ni hypertension..."i said "ololufe ,me too i dont know why i'm like this....i think i just love trouble."

im not matured at handling my emotions...what i feel in my heart that moment determines my mood and when i love which isnt often....i love deeply and when i .....hate....which isnt often either i do it i think im ruled by my heart......

so there u have a lil bit of me......or is it.......all of moi.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

beautiful girl

against my better judgement i'll do the meme thing but all the pple I'd like to tag are alredi tagged , so no point.

1. Put Your Zune/Ipod/iTunes/music player on Shuffle

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHAT!!!After you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to do the meme .

so here goes....

1.if someone says "is this okay?" you say ?
forever...chris brown....yeah i could....u know especially if he's saying i love this okay? u love me?...then i could say forever...would be kinda romantic dont u think?or from ibiluv's perspective.....he's "doing" u right and he asks this ok?and u reply...forever.

2.what would best describe your personality?
mo gbona feli feli.....dbanj...honestly u guys...i wasn't it my fault i have a very diverse taste in music?.and yeah!mo gbona feli feli....if u know what i mean...

3.what do u like in a guy/girl?
party rider.......9ice......naah!!! he got to have depth too men!...... do u feel today?
malaria.......malaria ke! bii tii bawo....pls o i no wan sick o.

5.what is ur motto?
street credibilty.....9ice....yes o sometimes I can be gangster like that.......

why do u cry?.....matt pakora......cry ke?... i'm gangster men! i hardly cry......

malaria.......haba!madam B and hubby are not that bad now>>>>chei!

4 bar statement...chipmunk.....pls o i'm a teetotaller.......dont drink at all

9. WHAT IS 2+2?
party people.......nelly & can 2+2 be party people......dis thn don dey kolo o....

4 bar wetin i do this chipmunk sef?but she dey nack gordon sparks sometimes sha......

i dont wana lose ur love tonite........yaya(doing an awilo move.....can't evn dance makosa nut men! is this cool or what?.....

sweet kinda something.......yeah....rily sweet kinda something.......

bugi i no understand that one o......bugi bugi ko! bugi bugi ni!....

buzyy body.....p-square.......yes o i dey do busyy body well well about the person i like o ,i wana know all there is to know about them.....

hero...enrique eglesias......yes o. to my parents i'm a hero o...

one 2 step.....ciara........ o de make sense o.(and it makes sense o...)........

here with thats a song i so much so it makesd sense they play it morova......its very in it sounds like adirge....very slow and sober.starts like this......I didnt here u leave.....,wonder how am I still here.......and i dont wna move a will change my memories......cos i am what i am......blah blah blah,.....

don't matter......Akon........exactly!

aye o...infinity......yes o eyin aye...why do u want to know that one o......

I'll make love to you....boyz to beans!


beautiful girls.....sean kingston......I'LLremove the s.....and make it beautiful Girl...

so ciao

I'm tagging.....

geisha song,invisible,chari...buttercups,ibiluv,afrobabe,..carlang, least out of these 8 5 pple wont have been tagged alredi.....

Monday, September 8, 2008


what shall i blog about today.............???
sorry folks, this fasting thngy is not making me update as often as i should so as opposed to my 2 blogs per week subconsious agenda,I'll even be forced to do just one and also i rily have to do " decent" blogs so my topic for today will be female bosses versus their male counterparts.

The other day my colleague lets call him"eera ngbe sugar"(ants carrying sugar)...believe it or not he(the colleague in question) actually gave himself that name and I could not help picturing what he meant literally...u see this my so called colleague is very tiny...a male(very annoying too)....and actually looks like those ants with big heads(soldier ants ...i think they are called) and again i pictured a cube of sugar....u know how it seems like only one ant is carrying a cube of sugar....he was toasting this babe in my office....and i sentence could have depicted the situation better.not only is the babe a grade his senior in the office......., she's older than him by at least 2yrs and this babe is at least twice his size...picture a lady who weighs at least 120kg.The day the statement came out of his lips.....this was how it ensued

eera ngbe sugar:-cynic...u know i loook at this babe and each time i faaallll in love with her
cynic:-which babe is that?
eera ngbe sugar:-points at chic in question
cynic:-eehn!..that babe!...don't u even see the size of her....this one will kill u o.....u are not even on her level....ur salary cannot even buy her underwear o....
eera ngbe sugar:-who told u that....dont u know that I am eera ngbe sugar.....

and i tot the guy was about irritating!

Back on track as I was saying about my experienceswith male and female bosses,

I'm gona have to side with the guys on this one,I took a sample survey of my bosses.....the good the bad and the ugly....i tell u cos I've had them all.The bosses totalled various intervals though...

boss A(male)-
Lucky me then cos I was just learning the ropes, this guy was like a father..he would hardly chastise me...always encouraging me with .....u're just starting, don't be frustrated ,give it time....covering up for me with his own bosses and all....generally giving me no stress at all...even the times wen i was put in charge of some petty purse and money used to disappear due to no fault of mine....i would cry and he would just raise a voucher to cover for the missing money....i neva abused it...unlike some pple,i realised then that....peeps were just too fast and since i was new then....i was their"mugu"....u know now u have to be somebody's mugu .anyways all in all he was the "perfect boss to me"I used to wonder how come promotions neva came his way,turns out that his ogas the "iyas"(female bosses up there)....felt he was too soft as a boss!

boss B-(male)
I call this one Mr happy go long as things were going smoothly...he neva brought up funny issues that women will bring in to complicate things..we used to kid round a lot....his favorite phrase was "last e"-"ur last"...which he didn't actually mean. ... he was so jolly and full of wisecracks that i actually used to look forward to going to the office.

Boss C:-
Call this one baba ondo:-He was rotund with a round big stomach and kinda old...he even used to bleach and toast young girls who used to come and visit him in the office,...was even kind of scared of his own bosses but that dont mean he wouldnt cova up ur ass as his surbodinates.I remember one day he called me and said......"cynic..."bawo ni?(how is it) in that his ondo accent..."igba wo lama wa je raisi"(wen will we come and eat ur rice o)...ojo n lo....awon bobo yen nko(time is going...what about those ur guys).....'try ko hook ikan ninu won o"(TRY AND HOOK ONE OF (may Allah forgive me) at this junction....cos i neva could have tot I'll say something raw talking about my bosses....well u neva know...... he now said"o mope ...awa okunrin...aa kin ready o....a maa n redi ni".....for the non yoruba speaking people....u dont wana know what tht means....i'll tell means (we men ...we are neva ready,we redi_in yoruba redi...sounds like ready and redi....means tht they only lay women) oooh ooh its not giving me the rite effect...i mean redi is an amalgamation of "re" and "idi"-re -is a bricklayers term for when he applies cement on blocks to make them adhere....and idi_means a private i leave u to fill in the blank spaces

anoda time the man got into trouble with awon "iya" and he got demoted...cos he went and lost some money due to some 419 transactions he unknowingly did lets call them"cab" a new guy on the block now innocently called baba ondo

new guy:-baba ondo...pls im new here and i asked around and some pple told me u used to do a lot of "cab" transactions...pls can u put me thru.

baba ondo:-pls pls pls pls o....:"cab" transactions ko "cab" transactions ni,"cab" transactions (in that his ondo accent) lo gbe de bi ti mo wa yi jo jo won ni ba tie je(na cab transactions wey reduce me to this level u see me....pls ur own no go spoil...leave me o).....i was just lmao where i was sitting.baba oni baba

to be continued............

Tuesday, September 2, 2008


Like the lyrics of my favorite songs by sade,dido,asa,eminem....etc

sade:-"I really trusted u and every word u said"

dido:-I've still got sand in my shoes and i can't shake the thought of u

asa-"bimba n ke"

eminem-"will the real slim shady pls stand up"

Like Sade:-Cos i rily let go wen it came to u and I trusted u like I didnt even trust myself, like I felt we were rily on the same page.

Like dido:-cos u said these words to me("I've still got sand in my shoes and I can't shake the thot of u.") afta one long silent treatment we had and u did the contacting first, it made me feel like I was rily very corky of me...even conceited, but I guess when u're in love and ur rily sure this person is worth it u tend to feel this way.

Like asa:- cos I rily cried one day when I was supposed to be on a romantic getaway with my new guy....when I thot I was ready to give another man a chance...u still were hovering by weren;t you...u had not done enough damage right???!Even then I cried cos I couldnt shake the thot of u, I haven't admitted this crying to anyone not even C (my best friend)

Like:-Emimem>>>> cos Ur officially now in my tots as only the "real slim shady"....all emphasis on the shady....and oops the slim.That rily slim body I so loved, slim and sexy and not too muscular...strong arms, ure shady ....cos u kept leading me on even wen u had decided for all my weaknesses which u were supposed to haveloved along with my so very many.......strengths....we couldnt be together........u said I'm stubborn,strong headed....and not submissive enough..... I wonder if u really loved me,weren't u supposed to love me despite my faults.?.....we had a year and half in which u did not mind these faults until wen I was well and truly smitten...u yanked the stool from under me.....we had dreams...., aspirations....together....I remember and yet......u still had to guts to tell me I love u but u're too stubborn for me literally...., MORE OF SHADY COS I THINK ALL ALONG U PLAYED ME....I'm not rily sure but...all evidence points to that.

You literally left me emotionally inept for the next unfortunate guy that came was doomed from the start.......u keep featuring and I hope u're proud now that I lost him too....but bro u didnt get the last laugh.....cos of all the reasons I'll state below:

1.I don't regret knowing u cos I who thot myself incapable of loving any man, of sacrificing , of know that I'm capable of this and more when the right guy comes along....God! I remember I passed thru a lot of phases...afta u....I became more cynical....I was even about to marry someone I didnt love cos I tot I could neva let myself love anyone else the way I loved....loook ...cynic!i'm even admitting that I loved someone....oh my God! thank u bro....u rily made me know myself more and I thank u for that

2.In typical fashion,I'll say I'm more open to love now...and I'm not compromising...I'm not going to short-change myself....cos now more than ever I want all(everything love entails)...or nothing.Love is not over-rated.The greatest thing is to love and be loved in return

3.I also now realise my answer to this trickster:-Lord Bernard Shaw said this long time ago-:"Which is the greatest tragedy?...To get ones heart desire.....or to lose it
Some months back...I would have answered.....To get it cos ...... the cynic that I am will argue that If i had not met u at all...u being my heart desire....I wouldn't have known that pain....that followed afta u left, ... but now I know better....My answer is the greatest tragedy is to lose ones heart least u would have known love and ...........paradoxically matter how shortlived.and thus to u losing it will be the greatest tragedy.