Tuesday, August 26, 2008

the strip club gist

this is not for the faint hearted, or for the saintly , i intend to use very crude and vulgar language..

so the first thing i saw as i entered was a girl in a white bra see through and a g-strings....oh sorry thongs, she wasnt very sexy looking but men! was she srutting her stuff,i saw someone i knew almost immediately but u know it was one of this like customers or something, so i preteneded like i didnt know him thou he still managed to say to me"u're looking good"' my first reaction was ....an an haba in my turtle neck?????then i tot mayb he just wanted to embarass me for coming there at all, but me i no send i just walked on in,....me that i was still stiffing and all for x i quickly regulated ....as in for protection now ....so i allowed him hold me on the waist and i was like making a mental note to regulate afta tht day......(but that all backfired in my face)....thou tht na gist for anoda day,

on the wall there were 4 screens.imagine , one was playing porn.....as in hard core porn,anoda was showing like all these rap artists and their pornographic endeavours,on the third screen as if to mix / dilute the effect of the sex reeking in the whole room....guess what.....lord of the rings.part 3..then the fourth screen ,some other real life random pornographic thingy...

there was a stage, with the pole and on it i saw one very ugly looking chic, small breasts and very narrow hips, with small ass too rubbing herself, she was still fully clothed/....in her undies i men the typical pink lacy bra....that she did not buy the way do any justice and one small scrap of material that was supposed to be panties...she took off her top and then she was ass or was it rum shaking to this disco kinda song and....i was like ok this is still like cool.....wen then she took of panties too and started masturbating herself on stage and then she slid onto the pole and slid down and i swear all these hollywood strippers sef will give her award for her act, these girls can not be more than 22yrs old each and i wondered for a moment if they lived in lagos, were in school or somethn,all the while i tot i was going to be uncomfortable there but no......i saw anoda babe wu also came with her guy ...even dressed not too differently from the real strippers....then i sight this rily pretty girl and just like i was trying to console myself....(thou she was also wearing only her bra and pant) that she couldnt be one of them,i heard x say:hello,..........meet my girlfriend(abi dis one dey high on strippers...wu be ur girlfriend)...but of course I didnt say anything.....
stripper:"hello, how are u?hope u're enjoying this place...she said to me in a very quiet shy voice with a smile on her face....cynic:"yes i am
x:"she also says u're very pretty....once again i'm thinking abi ori bobo yii ti blow...as in make the girl no dey go think that i'm a lesbian and was ready for action...so stripper just smiled and went off....but rily o....i didnt say she was pretty then but men! this girl was clean and fine and i suddenly felt pity for her.....as in what kinda circumstances could have lead her to stripping and all......well as they say e no dey show for face and also"aja to b a ma sonu, koni gbo fere olode(the watchdog that is destined to get lost will not hear the whistle of its boss;;-the hunter....as i was saying...this girl was dark and pretty....nice breasts and lovely shape,looking innocent, a bit plump.....as in if i were a guy the way i'd like my woman, all shapely and well spoken....., i was still consoling myself...that mayb these ones don't go on stage to dance till i saw her in the next 15 mins mounting the stage........men, she stared straight into my eye and motioned for me ....to come join her.....my reaction was abeg o,....but i was gracious and i smiled at her.....,then i remember the conversation between her and xbefore she went on stage

x:"later u'll come and give me a lapdance
stripper:-what about ur girlfriend
x:-she wouldnt mind...and truely i wouldnt mind cos i dont see him as a potential mate.....but funny enough he was impressing me by behaving himself , not trying to let the mood get to him by groping me or anythn,.....na me sef they cling ...in the manner of ...dont try me o(cos one bobo cheapstake...i dont know whether upon all free and nude asses wey dey thr.....na my own e wan try use idea dey grope) ...i came here with my bobo o, i no be one of them o.

looking around me i noticed one white guy pricing lap dance....en en.. lapdance was 1000 box while just to feel and toch and finger and lick was like 1500, all this was going on in full view of evryone o, the girls were abound selling their wares to the highest bidder.

on stage this our chic(our friEnd) was thrilling, guys were sticking money in her panties, on her boobs evrywhr....

all of a sudden this razz luking stripper walks by and grabs my boobs---and i'm like wtf....x intervened and said i should let her go and reprimanded her saying...."u see me here u no touch me , na girl wey sit jeje u go dey touch"

there was also this very randy and lewd luking door....with VIP boldly written on it....with two doors that could swing open at the same time and ....ur guess is as good as mine as to what was going on inside that door,....blow jobs.....actual fucking, blowjobs...things i do not wna evn think about, wht have u....x was even teasing me that we shd pay and go find out what was going on there....na beans!liver fail me for that one o.

it was bad.,at some point i saw this girl , she was walking around nact as in in her b-day suit all over....obviosly trying to hook one whitey there....she even went as far as to make lewd dances in front of him, sticking her tongue and breasts out to entice him,....i swear it was a vivid picture of how sodom must have looked then in the days of sodom and gomorrah...walhi if i was God also i for don strike all of them...ah hem....me inclusive dead. instantly.......the irony of it was that...just outside and beside that strip club was this pentecostal church banner...inviting people for a crusade.

finally,the rudest shock of all.....there was one act that was going on on stage consisting of 2 girls, they were supposed to be lesbians, one had this penis looking thingy strapped to her panties and the other proceeded to suck and lick and all and then she was doing the normal motion of inserting the thing that by the way looked so very much like the real thin into the other guys cunt, all the while licking and masturbating....right infront of us, this girls were writhing and moaning by the way and even sweating,they were performing oral sex on each oda and it was.....rily bad and disgusting,at some point i got tired of watching the girls on stage i kukuma started waching lord of the rings..i was only grateful tht our "good girl"" was not a part of it.twas very terrible......i actually saw one of the girls cum......these girls are o more than 25 o......as in what is naija turning to.

i wont lie but at some point i was getting rily wet but omo i no show sign o, the bobo beside me sef...i kept trying to see if he was hard.....nothn......mayb twas nothing for him or like my crazy cousin will say ...to him this was refreshment.


so wen it wa like 3 ....after making sure tht x's money did not jona....i said pls let's get out of here.....this was ajeranju(chop and bulge eye) already for my poor eyes......

well sha....we left o......and then in the car we started teasing each oda....were u moved and what not..........ish.



34 comments:

Invisible said...

It is my turn. Number one here too. Off to read.

Invisible said...

Woah! That one no be strip club o. I hope you went home with x and relieved some of your tension. Abi una no get tension?
I guess I have the same question ' what has naija turned into? Chei!

Invisible said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Invisible said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Invisible said...

My comment got posted multiple times.

miz-cynic said...

@invisible-jst coming frm ur blog n am seeing dat o gbona feli feli.babes propositioning u and all. wel like isaid,iv regulated back 2 toasta mode n i did not do nothn wt mr toaster but get 2 know him.

Vera Ezimora said...

Wait oh, is this fiction or real life? This na serious orgy o!

And ehm....why on earth did you make the font pink?? You want make I blind? Mind urself oh!

Anonymous said...

OCEAN BLUE!!!

miz-cynic said...

@vera-u knw nw wn u wan talk dat kin tin..as a gud ge dat i am,i suppose code am now @chari-wt tuk u so long.ur lyk 8th or smtn.was ur experience dat bad 2 or shd i say .wink.wink dat gud.u knw one mans meat is anodas poison

ibiluv said...

well.........

nice one!!!!!!!!!!

i'm gonna get liver one day and go wit a friend........and we are definitely paying for a lapdance/blowjob/whatever.......i'll just watch.........

ibiluv said...

well.........

nice one!!!!!!!!!!

i'm gonna get liver one day and go wit a friend........and we are definitely paying for a lapdance/blowjob/whatever.......i'll just watch.........

Anonymous said...

no vvex mehn babe na devu...u for like holla me on msngr so u can fit to holla me whenever u update...8th is not ma portion mehn...

d@ place was EYE OPENING mehn...


babe...am surprised u didnt mention all the cellulite that was well represented....like ekkkk!!!

I left there a sad man mehn...even after everything and a whole lap dance...

Anonymous said...

yahoo msngr: jigglypuffy

miz-cynic said...

@chari-my yahoo msgr is 2 revealing,y dnt u send me a mail on mizcynic@gmail.com,r u pesonal friends with invisible? @ibiluv-i dnt say blowjob o.dat na vip section o.4 ful benefits 2 b reachd pls go wt a shaggable bobo o.wsh i cld tel u bt dat my own mr chocolate.upon hw hard i used 2 form i fell but al i feel now na anger

Mz. Dee said...

dang!! i no dey ever near strip club o!!

haba...! See as i de look back, make person no see me read dis thing!

But gurl ure hella funny!

miz-cynic said...

@chari-WHY NOW JUST GO TO FEED UR EYES NO...abi aint no crime in tht.an an dont u read afrobabe's blog??????make person no see u as how?

miz-cynic said...

@mz dee-WHY NOW JUST GO TO FEED UR EYES NO...abi aint no crime in tht.an an dont u read afrobabe's blog??????make person no see u as how?

August 29, 2008 3:16 AM

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

female strip clubs huh

not a really wise pound spent for me..

after all if im craving to watch hot female naked bodies

I can hit the gym showers, or the sauna

but give me an annual membership pass to a male strip club anytime

miz-cynic said...

@definitely-we mere mortals have 2 start from somewhere

Nigerian Drama Queen said...

Talk about orgies! You definately have some liver girl! My friends who have gone, come back feeling either grossed out or horny. Which were you?lmao

miz-cynic said...

@n.d.q-both,n prbly a bit empty 2.i went out of curiosity anyways

Unknown said...

Hmmm...nothing new under the sun.

miz-cynic said...

@naijalines-exactly.airi rue ri a fin deruba oloro ni-means iv neva seen dis b4 o is just u trying 2 scare d peson involved

Buttercup said...

wow..nawa o..

ur narration was hilarious!!!

imagine a church being close by..haha nawa o!

miz-cynic said...

@buttercup-the irony of life.

princesa said...

Wow!
My latest post was actually on this same strip club o!
I was there last friday and my eyes saw red!!!

Babe, you said 1k for lap dance. I actually saw someone pay N200 o!

That place really felt demonic!

miz-cynic said...

@princesa-men! i actually saw thast ur post and i was lmao,and i tot i went on the worst of days.....urs was wicked! men.....eeh yah sori...its actually demonic

theicequeen said...

abi dis one dey high on strippers...wu be ur girlfriend)...

that one is makin me laugh ehnnn!

the story sha hawt o! but that one has passed strip club naw! live pornography? hmmmmmmm! what is our Naija turnin intooooo!?

my amebo for like move me go ther to look sha ;)

theicequeen said...

abi dis one dey high on strippers...wu be ur girlfriend)...

that one is makin me laugh ehnnn!

the story sha hawt o! but that one has passed strip club naw! live pornography? hmmmmmmm! what is our Naija turnin intooooo!?

my amebo for like move me go ther to look sha ;)

miz-cynic said...

@ICEQUEEN-ITS A TYPICAL CASE OF IROYIN O TO AFOJUBA

Omo calabar. said...

Lol. Didnt know there are stripclubs in las giddy. I guess since i neva lived there i shouldnt be so surprised. but strip clubs in the states are fun though i only go with friends on special occassions like birthday and bachelors party, u know boys are always gonna be boys. But yeah interesting read.

miz-cynic said...

@omo calabar-strip clubs dey o, i found out too last year.

Anonymous said...

Interesting to know.

Anonymous said...

Where is the location of the strip club in calabar?